A toolkit for living a good life

I did not see the cancer coming. Initially it felt surreal. I felt like I was in the audience watching my life play out in a pantomime.

I did, however, notice something about myself.

I took a deep breath, and just kind of got on with it. I tried to see the funny side of things, which held me together emotionally.

At times I’ve needed a big bag of courage, a dusting of bravery, an overflowing amount of resilience, strong connections to family and meaningful relationships with supportive good friends.

Choose how you live

Live with purpose. I keep a focus on what’s important to me and not on what’s happening in my life. Being aware of my emotions, finding ways to calm and soothe myself, being responsible to myself and not a stranger to the person within. I have learnt to laugh at myself.

Maybe in some ways being older helps, as I have resources, life experiences and frameworks to help me find my way looking forward.

Find your inner light

I am a positive realist. I find ways to keep my inner phosphorescence alive and do the things that are nourishing and sustaining, that make me happy, that bring me joy, love and peace.

Travel solo

After I completed six months of chemo, I booked a ticket to the UK. I had a fabulous week in the Lakes, then took a train to Scotland for a barge hiking holiday in the highlands, total magic.

All up I did four weeks solo travelling. I came home to Australia for a few weeks and then booked another ticket.

Solitude and stillness

I spend a lot of time by myself; I find it both healing and therapeutic. Maybe sitting on the precipice of life awakens the sense of oneness.

Choose your attitude

I refuse to be that person down the end of the bar crying in their pretzels. I have never cried over having cancer. If I feel a bit teary, I re-schedule a cry for the next day … doesn’t happen. Mostly I don’t do things that I don’t want to do.

Exercise

I exercise every day. Exercise is so important when going through treatment, which I am about to start again, for the fifth time.

Joyful activities

In the last couple of years, I have been taking flying lessons. I have also taken up blacksmithing. Earlier in the year I did a sky dive. Nothing beats flying.

Face your fears, live your life

 I am a strong, resilient and resourceful person. I have learnt that ‘if you don’t face your fears, your fears will face you’. Like a mirror.

New neurological pathways 

You can make new neurological pathways at any time in your life. I continue to do this through always looking ahead to find new adventures or ideas to start new pathways.

Beautiful people

If you are fortunate to meet extraordinary people who can continue to sustain and enrich your own life even when they are no longer here, that is gold.

I have gotten used to ‘living with cancer’

I would like to hope that there will be a future where there will be many more options available to women of all ages. Our stories are interwoven statistically and tragically worldwide.

Author bio:

Anne-Maree Wilton was first diagnosed with ovarian cancer in January 2018. To find out more about her story, watch the video below.